A level headed thot!

As some of you may know, I am in orkut community. And one day I happened to see a community “we hate India”, in orkut. I went there and found it so hurting for my self-esteem [or patriotism] that I asked every friend in my community to go there and report it as bogus. I don’t know who all did. But I got replies from Sab and Janu that they did it with me.



I got this mail, after that….




 The text is:

Hi

Did you know there us a "we hate....." for just about every country? I had a look at the I Hate Ireland community and found it full of Brazilians telling the critics to go home if they weren´t happy there. Give it a chance, give people who know india a chance to defend the country.

As India becomes more powerful and richer, you are guaranteed to see even more criticism and negativity towards your country....its just the way it is.....relax and enjoy...at the end of the day, nobody will get hurt by criticism.

Finally, the rich history and culture of India is strong enough to sustain a great deal of criticism.

Best regards

Michael
I read it once, then again and again…

At first it didn’t make any sense to me [my head was clouded by anger towards the “we hate India” community]. But then I realised. He is right. “We hate India” occurred because; somebody found India’s growth threatening. Somebody was jealous of its growing power and influence. If India was 100% poverty stricken, defenceless with zero military, with 100% illiterate population, will they ever give it a damn??  NEVER… then India would never even come into their wildest dreams, not even as a friend!



 For the first time, I saw a level headed person, who made others think in a calm and cool way. He made me think level headed. He made me look from another perspective. I don’t know him, as he is not in my friends list. But this is for him, who opened my eyes to a different view!



Thank you, Michael. This is for your level headedness!

When heaven reach for earth...

When heaven's rays reach earth....





photo: swathi just happened to have a camera when nature bestowed......

The man who flew wearing blue!!!

I first saw the magic thing called “television” in my neighbor’s house. The year was 1983. It was on my mom’s cousin’s house. Kamala chechi came to our home [both houses were in the same compound!], one afternoon, and told amma “Chechi, sent ur kids to our home. My brother has brought this TV and a VCR with some cassettes, from Gulf. We are going to put a film for the kids”. I was so excited. To start with, I didn’t know what the hell she was saying. But we have this excitement for unknown things, right? That was it.
 I gobbled my lunch as fast as I could, [I remember that I had stomach pain afterwards!] and was waiting at our doorstep, to get a call from kamala chechi. Finally she called “swathiiiii”. And I ran, faster than an arrow [I am pretty sure about that].

They had closed every single window in their sitting room. Even the air-holes were stuffed with clothes, so that it was pitch dark inside. I felt like entering a film theatre. There where almost 8-10 ppl in that single room, including 3 kids. We children had our seats on the floor. And soon the film started in a small square box, which was “Dyanora TV”.[later I learned it]. I didn’t understand the movie at all. There was this man who flew, who wore blue dress when he flew, and whose parents were killed, when he was a boy!!! [oooh! That made me sob!!] Yea, u guessed it right!!! It was the greatest movie of the life time: Superman(1978) !!!!!

After the film, I came out of the darkened living room, clutching my frock and blinked at the sunlight. I was feeling so sorry for the boy who lost his parents [that was the only thing that touched my heart!!! I didn’t care what he did when he grew up. [He flew or saved the world, I don’t care!!!!] . I was wondering how he grew up with NO parents!!!!.

I went home, with a very heavy heart. I was so sad that the one which aroused my expectation to sky high, ended so tragically!!! I told amma crying; “Ammaaaa, it was very sad… they showed blood [I was very scared of it!!]. And this boy’s parents were killed. I will never see TV again!!!”. It depressed me for next 2-3 weeks that I vowed I will never even go near “the TV”.


Now after 22 yrs, I saw “Superman Returns”, with my hubby and was laughing like hell, when superman carried an airplane, a rocket, a car, a train, and even a new continent in his own back! Can you believe that, a whole damn continent!!!
Ie how you change… from sobs to mocking laughter……..as you lose ur innocence!!

note: The movie led to three theatrical : Superman II (1980), Superman III (1983) and Superman IV: The Quest For Peace (1987), as well as several canceled sequel attempts after 1987. The 2006 film Superman Returns continues from the first sequel.

Virtues and Vices of being middle class!

When I was in 1st standard, every single friend of mine had a pet name. Vinod was called “kuttu” at home, Jisha was “chootti”, Priyadarshini was “pachoo” and Harikrishnan was “hari”. When they asked me what I was called at home, I gingerly told “umm…swathi only”. And they asked “why don’t u have a pet name?” And I didn’t have an answer. I thought my parents didn’t like me that much, as my friends parents loved their kids, and ie why they called me “swathi” at home. That day I made such a fuss at home, to make them call me something “pet” instead of the same old “swathi”[O! God! How much I hated that name!!!]. But they didn’t budge at all! They told its only “swathi” and it will be only that way. I finally consoled myself that I have to accept the fact my parents never loved me as my friends parents did. That was such a big truth, for me, to accept at 7 yrs!!!   Another evidence for me that supported my theory of me having “non-loving” parents was that I was allowed to call my mom and dad ONLY “amma” and “achan” in Malayalam [our native tongue], while my friends parents were their “mommy” and “daddy”. It was the time, when we had this “gulf boom” [just like the IT/US boom, that we have today!] and all the NRI parents preferred to be called “mommy” and “daddy”. In fact “mommy” and “daddy” made them [and us] feel that there was an invisible class division between us!!! We were the old, ordinary “amma”, “achan” type, and they were high class!!! I made the second fuss at home [this time, it lasted for months!!!]. I tried calling my mom “mommy” but she never answered me. She was adamant that I MUST call her “amma”. Only then she would answer me or give me food. Finally I had to succumb to her decision, cos I needed my food more than she needed me! There ended another desperate effort of mine, to rise above the middle class!!!   After that I didn’t do many trials to rise above my middle class level. I was constantly reminded by my mom that we were middle class and our “wish-list” was limited. Even now, amma reminds me that!   But now I am thankful that I have only single identity and not any more funny pet-names. I am proud that I call my parents “amma” and “achan” instead of mom and dad. Also I should thank amma, for practising me to look at the price-tag first and do a very fast mental mathematics on that month’s finance, before buying anything! And my husband says that makes me the best home-minister of finance, though he sometimes call me “uncle Scrooge” !!

The end of a yellow swing ...

In our old house, we had 2 swings in a single mango tree, in 2 branches. The smaller one with the yellow plastic ropes was the first swing in our house-hold. As soon as it was made, I self-proclaimed, its ownership to keep my cousin away from it. [“MY dad made it!”-was my reason ]. But the elders didn’t reckon my “gunda-ship” and soon made another one, for my cousin. Truly, it was far better than mine. It was much larger, and its seat was made of flat-wood, while mine was cylindrical.[oh!! That made my bum sore!! ]   To my utter shock and despair, she never got up from it. She ate, talked and spent more than 5 hrs a day in that. I waited like a “planning murderer” to get hold of it. I tried blackmailing her or luring her with some “goli” [colourful pebbles!!!] in exchange of the new swing’s ownership… naaah! She was not “that” type! She had the ability to think, u know…So, I waited and waited…   When she went to her dad’s house, I jumped with joy. I was in her swing 24 hrs a day. I sat in it… then when I got bored, I stood on it. Then I sat with my legs on either side… I swung lengthwise and even breadth wise… finally I had enough! Fine! Now that’s the fun you get, when you enjoy others things in their absence!!! Certainly I did enjoy!!!   When she came back, I wasn’t so desperate this time. I have “known” the fun, now. But still, there was this gnawing feeling inside me that she had a better and nice swing. Our playmates preferred to be with her. They took turns in using her swing. Because of my not-so-good behaviour when I “owned” the yellow swing, I was prevented from using the new swing! Amma told : “You didn’t share your old swing with her. So now you are not entitled to share her swing!”. Now you know why I considered her as my rival. Even my Amma supported her…**scowl**. See, I hated her for a valid reason, u know… I was 6 then, and I know I had relatively less bad behaviour for a 6 yr old!!!   Now, after 20 + years, my own yellow swing is gone... It suffered a natural death, when the parent branch went down on a heavy monsoon . And I wasn’t living there any more to mourn!! But the mango tree is still there and to my utter disbelief, my cousin’s swing is undamaged [that swing is 22 yrs old!!!! ]. It can carry even my current weight.[he…he..he] Whenever I go there, I will spend at least 2 hrs in that swing, to compensate for all those desperate years of “swing longing” LOL!!!

A Middle East experience!

When I was in India and my hubby here in Ireland, I was constantly shuttling between these two countries. The result being, a big financial stress for my hubby paying for my tickets and me becoming Gulf Air’s priority “frequent traveller”. Except for the 12 hrs transit in any of the Middle East [mostly Bahrain, Abu Dhabi, Oman, and Qatar] I enjoyed those journeys. After every such thing, I felt Ireland is getting closer to India. It really did, at least for me.
When I stayed in a hotel during 12 hr transit time, I always went outside the hotel, to near by shops, just to see how the country looked like. [my amma would kill me to death, if she ever come to know about it, cos my passport was with the hotel reception, then !] These are some photos I took from Bahrain duty free.



I was awed by this sight of the whole holy Quran inscribed in glass. Can you believe the whole holy book was inscribed in glass sheets, and was available in various sizes!!



These mechanical puppets with fishing nets and Arabic costume, made everyone stare at them for 5 minutes!




Those M.E duty free shops are what I call SHOPS! Oh! My, they have got every thing on earth. I found even the whole “F.R.I.E.N.D.S” series [of almost 10 yrs] as DVDs!!! This car looked like a real emperor!!!! [sorry, I don’t know its make and model!!!]






These 2 kids of different nationalities caught my eye when the elder one [with the pacifier!! ] soon got very close with the baby [without the pacifier]. Just for 10 minutes they were together. Later when their parents dragged them, to different flights, I saw them looking soooo longingly at each other, looking back again and again…the scene almost made me cry!

Unexplained!

Today I was a little bit sceptical about life as a whole… happened to read one of my friends blog and depression creeped into my mind like a bacteria and its gnawing on my mind/heart. I mourn with others.. is that a good thing??? “never” is what my hubby says. Similar things bothered me, 4-5 days back and literally I lost my sleep. I wake up at 1 am and 4 am and used to walk around the house. I used to say things about it when I was half asleep and my hubby got really worried. He took an appointment for my insomnia and one day before that , ie yesterday, I slept w/o waking up 4 times in the middle of night. So finally I got over that…


Now its again…my mom is again admitted to hospital…couldn’t even talk to me. I would love to bring her here with me, but she is so frail that she cant withstand the cold climate here. And miles apart from me, with no other kids for her, to look after, I am so helpless. I feel guilty for coming here, with her there. As they know that I will make a fuss, they won’t call me up and tell anything. If I miss her call, I have to assume that she is sick. And almost every time, my assumption will be correct…

I don’t know what to write…her life got wasted for me… and I cant give anything in return.

Every single day she called me, and i will be damn busy with wrk and i cut  her call very quickly.. today when she didnt call, i shud have realised  how mean i was, with her!

NOTE [19 July] : i called her today morning. she is fine.. she is recovering!!!
thanks guys for ur support !