On the first day of this Mothers day month(which I wasnt aware until I saw those cards on display!)
I must say ,that , with every of my single ‘mothering’ experience for the first time,
I am ermmmmm...happy? ..thrilled?...stressed?....exhausted?...had numerous break-downs?... all of the above?... or just simple plain ‘enlightened’?
Yes exactly. Thats what I feel. All of the above and more and mostly enlightened in a thousand number of ways. And though I think there are going to be many more in the future , the best and probably the most brilliant enlightenment I had, was just a day before.
Yes, mommies, the thing we always...always..always do, and which never ever should have been done. Putting yourself far far away...err...almost to nothing.
Now back to me. I was never ever stayed at home for more than a few months in my life. Not even ,those days when I started learning alphabets. And here , it is going to be almost a year since I have been a 100% stay-at-home mom. It is so easy to type that line and just looking at my clock which shows 4am, and wondering when my 8 mth old would wake up screaming, I honestly wish if it would have been just 100 times tougher than just ‘typing’.
Last few days, I have lost count of the numerous nervous breakdowns I had, all because of just pushing me to the very end of the queue of my priority list.
Ofcourse I have been always selfish, what else would you expect from an only child? But what would happen when she is left with an only child? Just any mother would do. Pushed every other thing ahead of her, except her needs..
And the result??? I felt sick almost everyday leaving my little girl scared, insecure and cranky. And I was like ‘ For once, I stopped being selfish and here I fall sick always!’. And only today I realised that I was making the BIG MOMMY mistake. By being selfless, I was actually being more and more selfish to my baby. I felt sick continously, and was unfit to feed her, change her, play with her. I didnt eat sometimes for more than 24 hrs, postponing it, doing my MOMMY chores one
after another. And I thought I was being the GOOD MOMMY.
No I wasn't. I was actually being the BAD MOMMMY, by making myself not available to my baby, when she truly needed me. And yes, that is THE enlightenment I got today.
Lesson : Healthy, happy babies are not born like that. They are raised to be so,by a healthy happy MOMMY, and not by a sick, weak MOMMY. Yes that was the truth.
And by putting myself last in my TO-DO list, I was destroying a healthy, happy mommy who was supposed to create a healthy happy baby. And how can I imagine that I was becoming the ‘selfless’ mommy??
This is the GREAT mommy mistake. So, all mommies, who havent got this 'enlightenment' yet and feel guilty when you are sick that you cant take care of your little one, always remember this one
Golden Rule:
------------
Healthy happy mommies make healthy happy babies. So if you want to make sure you always see your babies smile, make sure to put yourself in your priority list without feeling guilty, or in the long run, you WILL REALLY REALLY feel guilty....
and with that.............
HAPPY MOTHERS DAY TO all those naive mommies, who forgets to eat, bathe , and think about their life , just because you dont have TIME for yourself, and you are too busy looking after your baby.
Just remember for a tree to spread out, the roots must be watered and looked after...
Got to go... mine is screaming calling ‘maaammma’....Oh I forgot, I have to eat
[caption id="attachment_479" align="alignnone" width="300"]
tired grumpy mother[/caption]
No comments:
Post a Comment