Our life (me and my hubby’s) start at 7 am, every working day. We can’t have a proper breakfast (in fact we never had one!) as both of us will be running around the house to prepare ourselves for office. By 8:15 am, I will be at the kitchen, to pack us lunch (I cook it, the day b4 and keep in the fridge!). Earlier we used to have lunch from our office restaurant, till my body started rejecting non-spicy, sauce-filled Irish food and mashed potatoes by constant migraine and nausea! Then by 8:30am we will be inside our car. The temperature outside will be 12 degree Celsius then.
From 9 am till 7 pm, we are in our domain. We don’t even meet for lunchtime. He will have it with his friends and me with mine. [His building is far away from mine, is one of the reasons!].
Now at 7 pm, the decision comes… who is going to work late… if he is going to work late, I have to drive home, alone and have to come back at 9pm or 10 pm to pick him up. If I am going to work late, he waits for me till 9 pm in the office. And if we come back at 7pm, I will go to gym at 7:30 and drives home back by 8:15 pm. After that I cook dinner and lunch for the next day. By the time we have dinner its 9:30 pm, and some TV till 11 pm. Cleaning kitchen comes in the middle of TV watching.
I don’t remember when I sleep…and the next day, the cycle repeats…
This is the routine of working couple here…
Sometimes when our parents or relatives ask, like “no plan to start a family yet?â€, this routine comes into my mind. There my relatives and friends in India, have started their families. But they can… they have their parents near them… may be in different state. But they can always seek their help. What about me? I can’t bring my mother who is a chronic arthritis patient into this 5-15 degree Celsius temperature. I can’t bring my mom-in-law who is 65 yrs of age and who is down with osteoporosis.
Here I am so alone in this cold country, with only my hubby for help, love and support. Where would I find a slot to add a family into this?
And I thought Europeans worked till 5 PM!! Gosh you really need to make space for family time in there.. It is so important, be it with or without kids! Speaking of which, yes some changes need to be made before getting kids in the picture!!
ReplyDeleteThat had a certain warmth to it !...I don wanna ruin it with my Off teh hook comments !...
ReplyDeleteTake care !
Manu
i thought i was the first one !...Hmmm !...well !...Whats the C's all about ?
ReplyDeleteOops, sorry about those Cs
ReplyDeleteHey come to US! It is so lively and we have so many Indians too here (though not in every part). And we can work about that routine thing! ;)
Myra typed those C's... gotta go now!
ReplyDeleteUS of A !....Hmmmm !..ANy takers ?
ReplyDelete**Hugs**
ReplyDeleteHow about coming back to India? :)
ReplyDeleteSab--u r right..europeans generally work only till 6pm(not 5pm!). and they are not very particular in finishing their tasks b4 allotted time. but we indians are not used to this, so we work late!
ReplyDeletehmm..yea....dont know how!
cheeze---thanks! for shutting up! LOL!!
Sab---we are the only indian working couple in Ercisson here.. rest of the indian guys are from wipro.. and they tend to keep away from us, as we are in their client position!
and thanks for the invitation! even i have thot that US has more indians than in europe!
lissa--thanks!! *hugs*
shashank--i would LUUUUUUUUURVE to be back in india. but then i have to sacrifice my marriage for it...as my hubby wont come !!!
swathi ...u know how much fun sab is having with kids ....make up ur mind.....
ReplyDeleteIts okay gal! Give it some time... Rt now, you guys just started off meddling both work and home... after some time, your lifestyle will come into some sort of equi-position... you know after climbing the career ladder a bit more and learning to stabilize the work and home hours.
ReplyDeleteGive it some time, and after that, you can obviously find a slot for a small lil family! Afterall, you are meddling work & home... that itself is a huge task. I'm proud that you have perfected that task in no time. And I'm sure you a find a slot for this too when the time is right! *smiles*
I always say, swathi can always find simple solutions... howmuchever complicated the situation is!
Leave the other people and relatives yaar.... let them have family or do whatever they want to. Who bothers! LOL!
Cheers,
Aswathy
i know about the work pattern in bpos..been there ..seen it all......all da best
ReplyDeleteI think you can work it up there itself..! I feel its fun..! sorry I dont know much, but spending more for family is very important! and kids... must be real fun! ;)
ReplyDeleteAJ--ask sab, kids are not just FUN alone... they are responsibility, sleepless nights and more quality time with them than just simple FUN!. they are future genration to be moulded not just barbie dolls!!!
ReplyDeleteaswathy---she knows exactly why i talk about this.. ie why she is soo specific...thanks alot, dear! nobody seems to understand how i juggle home and tideous work!!
ReplyDeleteYes... yes Swathi! Kids are a lot of fun but the parents need to be ready to have them...
ReplyDeleteAnd yes, Indians are so infamous, even here all the amreeki people disappear at 5 or 6 PM, but the Indians go one working... Kya karein we have to live upto our image of hardworking!! And damn proud of it!!!
Swathi,
ReplyDeleteNever been in this situation before.. Still single, who works till 5 and leaves office to have fun. For me, 9 - 5 is just a break from all the fun oustide. So I shouldnt even be commenting on this blog with suggestions.
There is a time for everything in life..
ReplyDeleteKids will come in its due course..... :>
As far as relatives are concerned... oh well.. just ignore them.
It's not very much different here, either Swathi. As the saying goes, "the grass is always greener on the other side". But I have raised my younger two musketeers with just my hubby and a hired nurse to help. My aunt - mother's sister - is my neighbour. My parents live just a heartbeat away. But then, you are all alone when it comes to rearing your babes. Gone are the days when mothers pamper over you with post-pregnancy care. Today, the attitude is do-it-if-you-please..! I still recall the days when my grandma used to care for me, while Mom and Dad went off to work. I mis my grandma so much now. But she's no longer in our midst any more..!
ReplyDelete~Devi~
Well,thanks for the insight into a working day of your life.Its a tough choice of when to have a baby , all the more with the both of you working.
ReplyDeleteMay be , you first need to decide how a long break from work you plan to take , if its only going to be a few months post pregnancy , then you would definitely need some help to take care of the baby.
But trust me Swathi things arent going to be much better as long as both of you go to work full time. So you might need to find some1 to help you out with the baby.
Its usually only the first 2 years the child stays home longer therafter he/she wcan be left at day care.So things do tend to work out,.I agree with Arfana .
Have one when you really miss not having one.Cheer up.
when my wife gave birth second son, my mother was not well. We left 5 month old Aswin(my second son)in my mother in law place(700 KMs away). Only after three years we brought hinm back once my mother was alright. God will show some way Swathi.
ReplyDeleteswathi just gave me a verbal slap...phatak!!..ur ryt...but ist worth having the responsibility.
ReplyDeleteVarkey---wow just till 5!!! great man!!!
ReplyDeleteArfana---i penned down my feelings...cos no one except my hubby who is the sole witness seems to understand things! i am happy that he DOES! thanks dear!!!
Devi--- hired nurse!!! here we dont even get that. babysitters are available on hrly basis. and that too only for a max of 3 hrs a day!!! creche takes kids from 3rd mth, i think! but still only till 5 pm! my parents are ready to come and help, but i am worried abt their health! but still i think being in india, itself reduces half the probs! and thanks alot devi, for sharing ur exp!
June...--as u said, a break is the only hope...and how long is another question! even for irish ppl, their moms come up and stay for some months! and thanks a million for dropping by! and yea as u have said "we will ahve one when we really miss NOT having one..NOT when others force me!!!!"
sekhar---thanks sekhar, i would really appreciate that!
aj--naaah! no slaps!! i just meant that u shud look deep into it rather seeing ONLY the fun!
QUite true,
ReplyDeleteu have an excuse of being in Foreign COuntry, we are alien in our own country..
I get up at 5:50 am, prepare breakfast, pack lunch, catch 8:15 local reach office by 9:20...
leave at 6:10, reach home by 7:50 pm, relax a bit, cook dinner.. and then sleep, for help I've maid...
Hubby have more busy schedule and he travels longer...
Starting a family is a big question ...
Oh Swats! Like cheesy said, i won't ruin it too, but i'm learning a lot about life after marriage from people like you , but like Sab said, you need to make time for family :D Would love to hear you write about your kid someday :)
ReplyDelete